• Hari Got Me Pizza!
  • Hari Got Me Pizza!

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  1. #1
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    Hari Got Me Pizza!

    Last night was quite the night, full of some great conversation but most of all, it really made my weekend. I absolutely did not expect a pizza delivery while sitting on a hospital bed, especially given how I've been getting really bored of hospital food, and Domino's double pepperoni is delicious. (Especially with garlic bread crust!) Dr Pepper is also a strong fuel source of mine! (More specifically, an intellectual drink for the chosen ones!) I only talked about takeaways in hospital with Hari for a brief moment as we were laughing over a bizarre article about it. That was that, then I got a shock when I discovered I had a pizza waiting at the main reception (already paid for) since the driver didn't have ward or room information. I was calm and explained the situation and a nurse was kind enough to collect the pizza, and the three Dr Peppers!

    Sorry about my bad positioning and generally not being in the photo. The photo was very improvised, which a nurse snapped who I couldn't expect a lot of patience from. Quality is also low, but the text reads:
    "hariLOVESpizza... apparently!
    (though maybe not as much as me)
    (and my love of Dr Pepper)

    Thanks so much, Hari!

    You're awesome."

    Hari Got Me Pizza!-me2-jpg



    It may be weird how a pizza lover's (it was a part of Hari's old username) kind gift made me decide to open up about this history, but I've mentioned my hospital stay before so I may as well tell you the whole story which won't be brief. Toward the end of 2008, I suffered a couple of seizures. The next year I was diagnosed with temporal lobe epilepsy. Epilepsy is often not as clear-cut as Hollywood suggests. Unlike on the big screen, in only about 2% of cases, a person's seizures are triggered by lights. I'm amongst the 98% unaffected by strobe lighting. For me, it can be random but a couple of the main triggers are stress and sleep deprivation. And for the first year of having epilepsy I was in denial. I wasn't ready to accept what this was doing to my life. That oddly helped since I was near the end of college and it helped me pass with decent grades. Things soon changed though when I was thrown into a new environment that needed lots of adaptation to socially function.


    Over the years my seizure frequency has changed. This is because doctors experiment with all kinds of meds to find the right combination. Some seizures make me space out or forget words, or make me unable to speak momentarily when the seizure happens. The "tonic-clonic" seizure is the big one you see on TV, usually minus the extreme Gilette-style foaming of the mouth. Weird Hollywood. Anyway, I went to university and I tried my best, but it got tough when I was often unable to attend due to hospital stays. Having a seizure in front of my classmates, holy shit that was a downer. I locked myself in my dorm for a couple of days and they seemed uncomfortable around me when I returned. Perhaps that was me. Since one of the most important hospitals for researching epilepsy was close(ish) to the university, at the time I registered with it and due to some VERY long queues I've continuously gone halfway across the country since which is where I'm staying now. The queue that I've been in for several years is for epilepsy surgery.


    You see me wearing something like a turban in the picture! Actually, I recently had my first major surgery which lasted perhaps five or six hours. The surgeons inserted fourteen probes into my brain and bolted them, then covered it all with bandages. This is so they could monitor every nook and cranny of my brain over the following two weeks (I'm over halfway through this at this time), intending to find the origin of my seizure triggers. This is so they can remove that part of my brain which is what I've been waiting for. Good news is that the teams are confident about finding it. Additionally, I've volunteered to help some research teams by participating in tests. They want to find out more about the relation between the temperal lobes, the hippocampus, and other parts of the brain when dreaming and general processing of memory. While helping epilepsy research, this also helps many other topics in medical science, and the guys have all been such fun to chat to, so I thank them for that.


    That's most of the story so far. Why the secrecy? Now I've opened up about it all, but in the past I've only talked about it to select individuals. Maybe I became a little insecure due to bad past experiences. I held the belief that telling people doesn't have to be necessary, and many people who've known me in real life still have no idea I have epilepsy. Most of the time epilepsy is usually an invisible illness. If you play your cards right you can often get away with that. When I've opened up to those I trusted, on a couple of occasions their attitudes towards me changed, like they were constantly worried about me, perhaps also scared due to going by what is taught by the big screen, which I don't blame anybody for. Hell, I didn't know jack about epilepsy before I got it. Possibly most of all, I used to detest appearing weak to people if I can avoid it. So that's why I'm telling my story in such a direct fashion. I'd be lying by saying epilepsy doesn't weaken me. I'm in a hospital for god's sake, but I've learned a lot over these years and gained respect for other people and their own problems. Now that's out of the way...


    Speaking of people, Hari's been a real friend to me since I knew him on Outlaw Star UK. Contact has been on and off with a period of time we hadn't talked in, but we can talk on and on. That's tough to come by nowadays. It's why I hadn't finished this post on the night of the pizza itself. I'm sure somebody would think, "Well, it's just a pizza isn't it?" It's more to do with the principle. Beyond online chats, Hari doesn't know me on a truly personal level or locally. But this is community. I'm really happy to have brought people together, friendships ultimately formed by a shared interest, and this has happened with plenty of other members and those they've connected with on the board, outlaw to outlaw. Hari saw another outlaw in need of a real meal and did something wholehearted—a feast Aisha would commend! (Don't buy me more. ;_; Delicious though!) I'm not talking about buying things, but intentions like this make me realise what I always loved about Outlaw Star UK/Nexus. We care for one another like a family of sorts. You don't get that on Facebook, which was a strong reason to give the forum a deserved rebirth. Don't get me wrong; I love posting on Facebook and the feedback, but if you haven't already, give the forums a try as a tasting of what made the internet great before social media. I can't say you'll get a pizza, but stick around a little and you'll get a friend.
    Gene: "Have faith in me guys, enjoy the ride—you're in good hands. I can handle this. I can do it!"
    Jim: "How do you know?"
    Gene: "I don't!"
    Jim: "I knew it."
    Gene: "That's okay. There's a first time for everything!"

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  3. #2
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    Good to know things are moving along. It's great how strong your are with letting everyone know what's up with your life personally and I wish you the best! Sounds like a journey with the acceptance and all that and the friend-reactions changing once told

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  5. #3
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    I'm jealous because I wouldn't know how to send you pizza at this point! That and I want some of said pizza, even though I had pizza for dinner myself. Either way, I do know I send lots of hugs to you, and even more to Hari! Because come on, that's just freaking epic, dude.

    Also 99% sure his handwriting is 10x better than mine.
    "I don't know what words I can say
    The wind has a way to talk to me
    Flowers sleep, a silent lullaby
    I pray for reply
    I'm ready"
    -Melfina's Song

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    I was wondering why this was taking you so long to write, and now I know why.

    All I can say is it was my pleasure, my friend. Perhaps I know better than anyone how much of a miracle food pizza is, so it was the least I could do for a friend in need of a little uplifting. (AND I couldn't bear the thought of you suffering through that shitty hospital food!)

    I'm ecstatic to hear you're finally going to be free of this, hopefully this doesn't come across as patronizing, but I know from our conversations what a terrible effect this is had on your life. In your own words, you have a lot of life to catch up on, and I wish nothing but good times ahead of you!

    Like you said Mantis, us Outlaws have always got eachother's backs.


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    Real talk: Faith in humanity restored.

    I'm glad I found my way here. Ya'll are decent folk, and Hari...that sure was a nice thing to do. Friendship like that is worth more than dragonite.

    Take it easy, Mantis. I hope knowing that there's people out there who care about you aides in your recovery.

    Remember...Outlaws NEVER go down easy.
    No one's gonna' give you a map. You've gotta' walk your own path.
    - Hilda

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  11. #6
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    Damn dude. You've mentioned being hospitalized before, but I didn't know it was that. I'm really happy you're getting some good, solid help, man. I love this place, and it sucks knowing anyone here is suffering like that.
    But, Hari, you're awesome man. Sending some pizza to a friend in need is always a way to cheer someone up. I mean, who doesn't like pizza? lol. And Mantis, you're a man after my own heart. I love Dr. Pepper, too. It's the only soda I drink anymore. (Though, the hospital I work at actually has decent food. But that's because it's actually owned by a company that specializes in cafeterias for places like hospitals...It's ridiculously overpriced, though...)

    And as others have said, this place is fantastic. I remember when I first joined, the only other forum I was part of (and still am) was a lot larger, and more informal than this place. I've always felt like we ARE like a band of outlaws. We don't go out hunting bounties, but you know what I mean.

    .

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  13. #7
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    Thanks for the nice words, guys. I've been very reluctant about explaining this in detail in the past. Firstly because as I think I said it doesn't have to be necessary. Also because if I was going to, I knew I'd have to make it long, yet try to shorten it (there's so much more I could have talked about) but realised that more than a couple of paragraphs is more than most people would care to read. Because if I try to just sum up what's led up to this in a few sentences rather than a few paragraphs people will get the wrong ideas. There is so much misinformation about epilepsy out there that only those with it will really know about. Leaving people to fill in the blanks could be counter-productive. But now I realise that most who really do care enough my situation will likely read most, if not all of the thread. And I fully respect that some will choose to not bother reading such a lengthy thread for whatever reason. That's fine with me too. The thread's not going anywhere and will float around in case anybody's curious.

    Hari: Oh yes, the hospital food. In their defence some of it is pretty good, but the trouble is the repetition if you're not very broad with your food interests. But yes, a lot of it is bad. So you've truly been a lifesaver. The past eight years have been a real struggle. The seizures gave me a more extreme agoraphobia, especially after dropping out. Getting a few freelance jobs was such a good feeling, but it's all tough with the medication I've taken to suppress (to an extent, hence why I'm having the surgery) the seizures, which makes you very fatigued.

    I believe I said to you, I want to make my 30s what my 20s should have been, and you're so right about the community spirit. For years I've wanted to arrange a meet-up, even though the idea frightened me a little, but I hope we'll pull it off one day, especially with more members.

    Lobo: Thanks, and that's right. Hospitals can be very isolating and scary to anybody. It sure helps to get visits from local family or friends, it's fascinating in a way how heart-warming interactions and people's support over the internet can be. While it's mostly interpreted through text messages, getting to know others and knowing there's a living and breathing person on the other side is important. I for one know that I'd get along really well with the outlaws I know here in the "real world". Online friendships can be a strong and meaningful thing.
    Gene: "Have faith in me guys, enjoy the ride—you're in good hands. I can handle this. I can do it!"
    Jim: "How do you know?"
    Gene: "I don't!"
    Jim: "I knew it."
    Gene: "That's okay. There's a first time for everything!"

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    Oh, your reply hadn't been created when I loaded the thread, pseudohippie! I'll be cheeky and double-post. Pizza is a real mood changer, so Hari had the right idea to cheer a hungry patient up! I really wish I had Hari's original avatar (back when he was called harilikespizza I think) since it's in some backups, inaccessible from my laptop here. It's so relevant too, since Link is holding up a pepperoni pizza like when he gets items from chests. Another Dr Pepper lover? You've gained extra respect from me. Steins;Gate was also so right to product place it in such a stylish fashion!

    Yup, this is a very casual environment (despite the seriousness of the thread) and I hope all outlaws realise that! Take a load off, I say. I've got to introduce some kind of bounty system or game at some point though.
    Gene: "Have faith in me guys, enjoy the ride—you're in good hands. I can handle this. I can do it!"
    Jim: "How do you know?"
    Gene: "I don't!"
    Jim: "I knew it."
    Gene: "That's okay. There's a first time for everything!"

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    Holy crap Hari that's the first actual photo of Mantis ever on these forums hahahah. Good job man
    "We All Make Choices. But In The End, Our Choices Make Us."
    -Andrew Ryan

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  19. #10
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    It is the za that binds us.

    It's a wonderful thing to see the internet do what it was always meant to:
    To bring people of common interests together and forge meaningful bonds that otherwise would never be.

    This is simply beautiful.
    "Believe in yourself and create your own destiny. Don't fear fate." - Narrator
    avatar by: beautifulhangoverx


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    This was a good idea Mantis.

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