Thread: Death Battle!

I'd seen a similar idea before but this is based on a popular topic. It's simple. Look at the last person's two provided opponents and decide who would win in this fight to the death. Afterwards explain your reasoning. Then you must add two characters for the next poster. The characters can be from any work of fiction, so long as the fiction isn't very obscure. (Thus, more popular characters are a better choice since obviously more will know who they are.) They can be a fair fight or downright ridiculous as it is a forum game. Add some pictures if you like. (Don't use massive ones, try ones below 400px in height.)

Oh yeah, I'll keep a log of confirmed deaths. Nobody else needs to continue writing it as I'm fine keeping track of it myself. Those killed in battle can no longer be used in a future post.

I'll start us off...

Gene Starwind vs. Godzilla



Winner: Godzilla
BRUTALITY

Godzilla has the size advantage here and can obliterate an entire city with relative ease. Gene Starwind usually wins battles through dumb luck. His only hope is if Godzilla somehow falls over and he blasts it in the face 9001 times with caster shells. Not gonna happen! Godzilla can fire ginormous lasers from its mouth! Beat that, caster gun! Even though some caster shells are extremely powerful, they could significantly wound Godzilla, but in the end Gene would probably run away screaming and be reduced to a bloody pulp.

The next fighters have been decided. Who will win? That's up to you, next poster!

Jigglypuff vs. Johnny (The Shining)



Confirmed Deaths:

Gene Starwind (Killed by Godzilla)

"Are you out of your fucking mind?!"


"Jiiiiiigglypuuuuu-"


-CRUNCH-


Winner: Jack Torrance.

Jack's gone apeshit in a possessed attempt to kill his own damn family, and a random encounter with a bad one-note karaoke singer isn't going to stop him from immediately swinging an axe right down between Jigglypuff's eyes.


"You set 'em up and I'll knock 'em back."


GET READY FOR THE NEXT BATTLE!!

SHREK VS SONICHU


Jesus Christ. I may have gone to far in a few places.

Note: I recommend using the option to retrieve the media and hosting locally when adding pictures in future. (That goes for any thread.) The reason for this is that once hosts like Imgur go under, images go with them! (Happened to a lot of threads from the OSUK days.) I have a lot of spare data in my hosting plan so just put them local.

Winner: Shrek

Sonichu is a formidable opponent. A yellow electric Pokémon that runs at the speed of sound and can zap foes to the extreme, from the get-go you know Shrek's in serious trouble. Furthermore, Shrek prefers to stick to his swamps. With Sonichu's electric attacks amplified by the power of Fanta, in that environment Shrek is likely to be electrocuted. Clearly, under different circumstances Sonichu could easily win this fight. However, once Sonichu would come to the realisation that Shrek strongly resembles his father, he'd feel unable to go through with this. Since Sonichu's an offensive warrior with a weak defence, Shrek would be able to crush Sonichu and eat him for lunch.

Next up...


Master Chief vs. Doomguy

Confirmed Deaths:

Gene Starwind (Mutilated by Godzilla)
Jigglypuff (Burst by Jack Torrance)
Sonichu (Crushed by Shrek)

I'm gonna have to give it to Doomguy. On top of having superior speed, he can hold multiple weapons at a time and his arsenal has some heavy hitters like the plasma rifle and the BFG. Plus, if we are to assume that classic doomguy is the same one that would eventually become the doomslayer from Doom 2016, the seraphim blessed him with greater strength and speed. Seeing as how he took down a skyscraper sized titan, it's not hard to imagine that he can rip through masterchief's armor with relative ease. So yeah, in short, Doomguy could rip and tear Masterchief in the end.

For the next fight... Revy from Black Lagoon vs John Wick!

REAL SHIT!! EDIT!!

John Wick.

He's had three movies compared to Revy's, uh, one series. He was driven to unprecedented levels of shooty-bang-bang skills because of a dog. Revy picks a fight and suddenly finds out that having the nickname "two hands" isn't really an advantage when the guy you're picking on also has two hands... and is frighteningly fucking fast with them.

WINNER

John Wick.

NEXT BATTLE:



DIO vs GULDO!

Winner: Dio

(This conclusion is from about half an hour of research and watching videos as I haven't seen either of these, but I think I did my homework pretty well.)

Dio and Guldo are both powerful in different ways. One similarity is that they both possess powers that are supernatural. Guldo may be a short, fat and smelly alien but he can hold his own against tough foes using his telekinesis. While he can use this to suspend an enemy he often uses it to hurl large objects or spears for massive damage. However, this special ability is almost rendered obsolete by Dio's Stand. A Stand is a visual manifestation of a person's fighting spirit and may appear as a small mecha. That alone may not be enough to withstand Guldo's psychic abilities, Dio has psychic abilities and then some. Using his Stand he can freeze time. What good is hurling a large object as a projectile when it can easily be avoided in a time freeze? Guldo doesn't have a strong defence. Dio could pummel Guldo using his Stand and evade all of his attacks for a surefire victory.

Shall we begin our next duel? Maybe another shootout!



Jack Bauer vs. John McClane

I know that most of you poor souls have not watched 24 and thus probably don't know a lot about Jack Bauer, so I've provided a short overview of Jack and John with some shootouts to help you draw an objective conclusion.

Jack Bauer is known by a large number of people as the biggest badass on TV. Having said that, John McClane is a good gunslinger, as seen in the popular Die Hard franchise.

24 to a degree is more based on real-life physics and shootouts. Therefore, Jack Bauer reloads and doesn't have infinite ammo but has an incredibly good aim. I recommend watching these for a better understanding of high-octane Bauer Power. You don't fuck with Jack Bauer as it's highly unlikely you'll live to regret it.







John McClane doesn't have as much combat experience as Jack but he isn't as restricted by laws of the real world. He has a decent amount of weaponry, usually with infinite ammo or a super-sized clip and is fast, although at times very clumsy.







Last videos show Jack/John a lot older than the first.

Confirmed Deaths:

Gene Starwind (Mutilated by Godzilla)
Jigglypuff (Burst by Jack Torrance)
Sonichu (Crushed by Shrek)
Master Chief (Shredded by Doomguy)
Revy (Shot to death by John Wick)
Guldo (Bludgeoned by Dio)

Ohhhh, you got a tough one here. I haven't seen 24 but from watching those clips, Jack seems as vulnerable as McClane but certainly has an iron will like John. Jack has superior training but then again, John McClane is used to going up against people that are better trained and better equipped than him. I have to say John because he has more of a knack of improvisation and can be resourceful with what little equipment he has on hand. (He made a big ass explosion using C4 and a computer monitor in the first movie). Of course, if John were to get into a hand to hand fight with Jack, he's screwed but I think John would be smart enough to know that he can't win in a direct hand to hand fight with a government special agent like Jack so he would more than likely keep his distance as much as he can.

WINNER: John McClane, though it sure as hell wont be an easy victory for him.

As for the next fight, let's have the most titanic battle of them all...Melfina vs. Wile E Coyote!

Winner: Huh?

Argumentatively Melfina simultaneously happens to be the Maiden of the Leyline, a different entity that resides in the Leyline. Nobody really knows how exactly the Galactic Leyline works, but following this logic Melfina is unkillable. At least, in a manner of speaking anyway. Melfina isn't necessarily a bio-android. Therefore, by default Wile-E could not win the battle.

Scenario A: Wile-E Coyote kills Melfina, but she still exists.
Scenario B: He does not kill Melfina, but Melfina probably wouldn't want to kill him.

Draw. Nobody wins.

Next up, hopefully something with more action...



Chin vs. Chun (Li)


Confirmed Deaths:

Gene Starwind (Mutilated by Godzilla)
Jigglypuff (Burst by Jack Torrance)
Sonichu (Crushed by Shrek)
Master Chief (Shredded by Doomguy)
Revy (Shot to death by John Wick)
Guldo (Bludgeoned by Dio)
Jack Bauer (Killed by John McClane and a divine intervention)

And I bring this thread back from the dead...

I have to go with Chun-Li being the victor. This is a woman with thighs of steel and if that doesn't take him out then her mighty blue fireballs will.

WINNER: Chun-Li

and for the next fight...Haruhi Suzumiya vs. the Alien Xenomorph

Damn Starwind55, you've really never heard of Hong Kong 97? I'd have thought you'd acknowledge Chin's brilliance. Him being an excessively proud Hongkonger I figured he'd go apeshit on Chun-Li. Time for another revival...



Winner: Alien Xenomorph

Well... Haruhi is fucking annoying, I'll start this off with that. Probably just about any sane anime watcher knows that already. So if I was a xenomorph, naturally I'd want to slash her to pieces. And they're pretty good at that. I don't think Haruhi stands much of a chance here with no weaponry. Her situation was summed up nicely by Aliens' Frost: "What are we supposed to use, harsh language?"

"You're fucking dead, kiddo."
-Last words Haruhi Suzumiya heard

Next up, we'll see two women who share something in common duke it out. That is, they have the same voice. But because it's anime let's pretend that they're unique in every way. It's time to fight, ladies...


(dat ass though)

Twilight Suzuka vs. Faye Valentine


Confirmed Deaths:

Gene Starwind (Mutilated by Godzilla)
Jigglypuff (Burst by Jack Torrance)
Sonichu (Crushed by Shrek)
Master Chief (Shredded by Doomguy)
Revy (Shot to death by John Wick)
Guldo (Bludgeoned by Dio)
Jack Bauer (Killed by John McClane and a divine intervention)
Chin (Blueballed to death by Chun-Li)
Haruhi Suzumiya (French-kissed by Alien Xenomorph)